By Minister Sonnie Robinson  (August, 2025)

A church should be a refuge of love, healing, and community. However, for many, it becomes a source of deep emotional and spiritual pain. Experiences like judgment, betrayal by trusted leaders, and a toxic environment can cause serious wounds. If you’ve experienced church hurt, remember: your pain is valid, and healing is possible.

Understanding the roots of your pain is crucial for healing. Church hurt usually comes from:

• Leaders misusing their power through manipulation or neglect.
• Feeling condemned instead of supported, especially during tough times.
• Being disappointed by someone you depended on in your faith community.
• Environments filled with legalism, favoritism, or gossip instead of genuine compassion. love and acceptance.

Always remember that the hurt comes from flawed people, not from God. His love goes beyond human flaws.  Healing from church hurt is a journey that takes time. Here are steps to help your recovery:

• Accept that you’ve been hurt and allow yourself to grieve your losses.
• Understand that human mistakes don’t define God’s true nature. His goodness stays the same.
• Pray first, and feel comfortable talking with a trusted friend, therapist, or mentor to get clarity and start healing.
• Forgive, it isn’t about excusing the hurt, but about freeing yourself from bitterness for your own peace.
• Heal…though it isn’t a straight line; expect ups and downs. Be kind to yourself. throughout the process.

If you’re contemplating rejoining a church community, proceed with care:

• Look for churches that emphasize accountability and grace rather than judgment.
• Start by attending online services or visiting in person to help you re-adjust.
• Share your past experiences with trusted leaders or members to foster understanding and support.
• Build connections slowly, allowing trust to form at a pace that feels secure for you.

Setting healthy boundaries will empower you to engage with faith communities while prioritizing your own healing and without repeating past painful experiences. Healing from church hurt is achievable, and with intentional effort and sincere prayer for guidance, you can navigate toward restoration.  

Remember, you are not alone, and your journey to healing is important.

Blessings!